Screw you, SIJ!!!

If you didn't know, SIJ stands for sacroiliac joints, or that spot on your lower back where you have those two weird indents. Husband calls them my butt dimples. Please tell me I'm not the only one with these.

This week I'm telling my SIJ that they can F off. Maybe I brought it on myself with a week of nice walks outside, vacuuming the car, and putting a massive spring clean on the house, but the ol' SIJ started slacking the other day and it really ticked me off. I was almost positive that if I stopped walking, my torso would continue moving forward and dislocate right off my legs.

So, I took to the internet to self-diagnose this pesky disease that has literally stopped me in my tracks more than once this week. The result: PPP, or Posterior Pelvic Pain set off by those lovely pregnancy hormones. Fairly common it appears, which makes me feel better, because that means i'm clearly not the only one with the butt dimples.
My research google led me to This website where I found home advice on how to deal {since I haven't yet gone to the chiropractor for an accurate diagnosis--though that is on my to-do list for next week!}. For kicks, my comments are in red.

Posterior Pelvic Pain Home Advice

Here are some tips for expectant women with posterior pelvic pain..

Lying down

• Avoid lying on your back for long periods of time, particularly after the 19th week of your pregnancy. Seems this is the only way I wake up in the morning. With my arms spread up over my head. I have no idea how long I've been in that position, but it seems to have worked for me for the past 22-23 weeks or so. Sleeping on the stomach {what I'm accustomed to} is out of the question.
• Try lying on your side (preferably your left) with a pillow placed between your knees and another under your tummy. Check on the pillow between the knees {body pillow} but how the hell am I going to fit a pillow under my tummy without rolling off the bed?
• If your waist sags down into the bed {this implies there should always be a space there?}, try placing a small rolled up towel under your waist. I no longer have a waist. I cannot distinguish where waist begins or ends, except in the front where it is outlined by boobs and legs.

Turning over in bed

• To turn to your right while lying on your back, arch your lower back, tighten your pelvic floor muscles and lower abdominal muscles and bend both knees one by one.
• Turn your head to the right and take your left arm over to the right of your body. Hold onto the side of your bed if you can. Just like how grandma does it.
• To turn, pull with your left hand and take both knees over to the right so that you roll to the right. As soon as possible, bend your knees up as high as they will go – this helps to lock out your pelvis and lessen pain.
• Reverse this to turn to the left.  So many steps--I don't have 15 minutes to get out of bed.

Getting out of bed

• Roll onto your side {if we're following the rules, shouldn't we already be on our side?} with your knees bent up, move your feet over the edge of the bed and push yourself up sideways with your arms. I don't know about you, but I could barely get a set of pushups in when I was 15 lbs lighter.
• Reverse the process when you lie down.

Standing from a sitting position.

• Sit on the edge of the chair.
• Keeping your knees apart slightly and lean forwards till your head is directly over your knees {easier said than done}, keeping your back straight. {ditto}
• Stand up by pushing up with your arms, with your back straight and tummy tucked in {who are they kidding}. This helps to hold your pelvic joints in their most stable position and may reduce your pain significantly. You know what else would reduce my pain? Not being pregnant. Being 15 lbs lighter. Being able to move without a 12-step program.

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All things aside, I think the world is telling me to get this checked out. About a week and a half ago {when all this falling apart started} I won a $250 gift certificate and hour long massage to a local chiropractic joint. Upon checking with the office I found out that they DO work on preggos and they WILL accept my insurance. #Winning. I've only been to the chiropractor once in high school where I was found to have two vertebre out of alignment and needed shock therapy for them to pop back in. Ever since, my back cracks on its own. Seriously. If I sit really still and breathe deeply, it'll snap crackle pop all the way down. Then there's the seated twisting I do to make it crack. Between the two, I may be addicted to aligning myself...it just feels so much better after. I do realize I'm probably screwing myself up for life. Flash forward 50 years and I'll be hunched to a mere 3.5 feet tall.

We'll see what doc has to say. How much work can they do on a pregnant lady? I'm thinking if they tied my feet to the ceiling fan I would feel better. Work them hips out a bit.

tough questions

Hellooo darlings! I want to start off by saying what a nice vacation we had, and I can't wait to share all the details with you--but first, there's something weighing heavy on my heart today. I could easily save this post for another day after I'm done sharing how awesome Mexico was, but I'm sort of in a place where I could use some support today, not tomorrow. It sounds so needy, I know--just bear with me, will ya?

This topic is killing me. I'm not sure if I'm just being overdramatic and self-centered, or what. While on vacation I was constantly reminded of the things I couldn't do: parasailing, swimming with dolphins {I guess they sense the baby's heartbeat with their sonar and will bang against your belly}, cliff diving, scuba diving, quading, drinking, etc... There were restrictions on just about everything I did. Now, I'm not meaning to go all "pregnant princess" on ya'll...I'm just trying to say that it was difficult to watch my hubby and the other couples we traveled with having a ball.

**Disclaimer** That doesn't mean I didn't enjoy myself and have fun--I definately did, it was just a different kind of fun--a relaxing, rejuvenating kind of fun {which is really just what I needed-really}.

What bugged me though, was smoking. Specifically, did others smoke around you while you were pregnant? Is it your responsibility to walk away, or theirs? How do you handle that?

What I'm going to say next might shock those of you that know I'm in healthcare administration, but I used to smoke, too. Certainly not everyday, not even every week...just socially here and there. There were times where it was more often than others, and it wasn't ever something I was proud of--it's just that I have a lot of  most friends that do, and it was sort of what we did when hanging out on the weekends. I am well aware of the effects, it was just that I took a "that's not going to happen to me" approach to it. We all know that's not true. Anyways, I quit altogether the day I found out we were expecting. No questions about it, I was done for good. I'm not saying those first couple weekends weren't hard when my pals would step out in the garage on a nice autumn night, but it was over and I was fine with it. Happy, really, to be free from it. It was always my plan to quit for good once we started a family.

I do need to say that our close friends have been hugely supportive and respectful since finding out I was pregnant, and I love them dearly for that. They are very protective in that they don't smoke around me and it makes life so much easier for me, and for baby.

The one person who hasn't been so keen on the quit efforts is my husband. He doesn't want to quit.

Now, this is NOT meant to be a hubby-bashing post. I love the man dearly, and I know quitting isn't easy for everyone. Nor is it my intention here to whine about how "if he loved me and baby he would quit," and "I can't do anything fun so neither can you", but rather I'm asking for input. For help. For support. For direction.

It wasn't until just recently that I starting nagging him about it. I promised myself I wouldn't nag, but last night I found myself doing just that--nagging. He stayed out after work with the boys for a few beers while I was at my zumba class and came home reeking of smoke. {Cigarrettes, people--not weed...just felt the need to clarify we don't condone that}.

I immediately got all righteous high and mighty with the "I'm almost half way and you can't stop yet?!" And the "you set the quit date for December 12th--it's February!" Let's not forget the "how can you watch my belly grow and not feel like you're endangering our child!?"

Not proud. Shameful, actually. Bad wife.

Anyways, I just want to know did your husband/sig other quit smoking while you were pregnant? How can I help mine, or is it not up to me? A couple of things: he has never smoked in the house {yuck}, he varies between a half pack and a pack a day {scary}, he's been smoking since high school and smoked heavily while in the Air Force and on both tours in Iraq. He says he'll quit when he's ready {but how can you not be ready with a baby on the way?!}

Preaching on the harmful effects won't scare him-he says "everyone has to die from something" and that's not a joke-he had skin cancer a little over a year ago and has permanent scars on his face from it. He's 27. He doesn't bat an eyelash at how bad it could have been. Or that he could have died from it. This tough guy mentality is something I totally used to share with him-why do you think I didn't think twice about smoking?

It's just that things are different now that it's not just us. That we're responsible for another life. I want to give that life everything I have-and be around for them. I cannot be selfish any longer.

So there you have it. That's pretty deep for my standards--I'm not much of a feelingsy, share-my-fears kind of girl. Consider this a line thrown out in desperation to not feel alone in this. 

I know he'll do the right thing, it will just take time. What I'm wondering is how I can support him through it.

Hot Docs

No, I'm not talking about THE Doctors...although that Travis Stork is pretty good looking. I'm talking about MY doctor. My obgyn to be exact.

How did you pick your primary care doc? Is it because that's who you (and your mother, grandmother, and neighbor's cousin's great aunt) havealways gone to? Does s/he have 4.5 out of 5 stars on HealthGrades? Or, were you lazy and didn't pick a PCP so your health plan automatically assigned you to one? (damn those pesky health plans!)

I was {over}sharing with my coworkers this morning about my very first appointment with the obgyn today and took quite a bit of flack for my choice in PCPs. First, they couldn't believe that I'd never been to a specialist before, and then they gave me crap for chosing the one that I did. Apparently "hottness" is not criteria for selecting a PCP, but I beg to differ. Mind you, my entire career revolves around healthcare quality and while "hottness" is not a HEDIS (real quality measure index)  measure, it is a GINA (clever, huh?) measure.

Think about it: would you rather have a sloppy, overweight doc telling you that your BMI is a little higher than optimal, or a clean, physically fit (read: desirable looking) PCP who looks like he actually gives a damn about his own health, let alone yours.   Exactly.

So I held my chin high and went to my appointment. Generally, these poking-and-prodding type visits give me the heebie jeebies and it takes all I have to not throw up from being overly nervous,  but I have to say today wasn't bad. He had a super-nice MA and even took the time to ask me questions outside the typical "do you smoke" checklist. Maybe he was just trying to be nice because he could tell that I was nervous...sort of like how he also told me he could tell that I was a type-A perfectionist for going to the obgyn before I was actually pregnant, but at least he was trying.

Did I mention he won this year's quality award from my company, has 4.5 stars on HealthGrades, and  is pretty damn cute for a guy in his 40s?  BINGO!